Thankful for Today 5.18.13

1) My dear friends Kati & Erin! It's crazy to think that it was almost 5 years ago that I met these two sweet girls at Panera.  I had just gotten back from Thailand and needed community in a bad way. I was invited to join their small group and met up with them and a few others that day at Panera. Only God would know that over the next few years we would grow to become dear friends! Our lives are all {a lot} more busy than they were 5 years ago but we make time to continue to walk through life with one another. Today we grabbed lunch and helped Kati with wedding registry stuff. It was so good! I just love those girls!

2) Sundress weather! It's so funny how with every season I look forward to the next! But right now I am so glad that it is Sundress weather! I love wearing skirts and dresses. If I could wear a sundress and sandals every day I would. I'm so glad the season is officially here! I'm sure I will shortly be longing for sweater weather but for now I'm thankful for the blazing hot sun!

3) Shoe designers who still make size 5 shoes! I don't know when the trend happened, if a study was done and people were found to have larger feet than in the past but I'm so thankful for those faithful designers who still make shoes in size 5. I really wear a size 4 but those are near impossible to find in Northern America. I have learned the tricks of wearing shoes a size too big for me but add an extra 1/2 size and I'm a loss cause. Most designers start makes shoes at size 6 and it makes my heart a little sad when I cannot find cute shoes. I was a Dillard's today and after a long search finally just said bring me out ANYTHING you have in a 5.  Ten minutes later the sales clerk returned with A pair of shoes, yes just one! So thank you Nine West, Jessica Simpson, and all the others who remember the small {footed} people!

4) Air conditioning! Today was in the 90's here in Texas, and I think the humidity was at like 352%! So maybe I'm exaggerating but seriously the humidity was crazy! My said sundress what sticking to my body, my hair laid limp on my head and I sweat in places I only knew sweat once I moved to Texas. Today such as these make me so thankful for air conditioning. I love that cold blast you get when you walk into a store after what seemed like a mile hike from your parking spot. I don't know how people did it before central air!

5) That I am part of the grand story of redemption seen in the Bible! I am so thankful that God is in the business of redemption and restoration! I have failed numerous times and yet God is restoring my relationship so that I can bask in His presence... I could not be thankful for anything more!

Thankful for Today 5.15.13

1) Have I mentioned that I have AMAZING staff?  If not, then let me tell you now... I HAVE AMAZING STAFF! I never thought I would want to be in admistration and supervise people but I L-O-V-E my job and for a large part its because I have such great staff.  Today I threw out my flowers I got for my birthday.  This afternoon I got back from lunch and found an BEAUTIFUL bouquet of flowers sitting next to my computer.  One of my staff said she heard me say last week that I always want fresh flowers in my office so she bought me some!  I am so thankful for how my staff love me well!

The Beautiful Flowers I got!

2) Comfy clothes!  I haven't been feel great this week.  I've been sore and achy all over and these Texas Allergies are killing me.  The best part of my day today was when I was able to get out of my work clothes and put on my yoga pants and my new Shane & Shane t-shirt (which happens to be THE most comfortable shirt ever!)

3) Brewed.  What is Brewed, you ask?  Well Brewed is my new favorite restruant in Fort Worth.  They have lots of locally brewed beers on tap, and many deliciously brewed coffee drinks! As amazing as thier drinks are, the food is even better.  They have duck fat sweet potato fries {Yes you heard me... duck fat fries, as in fries cooked in duck fat} They are melt in your mouth amazing!

Braving the storms at Brewed, enjoying our time with Kate

4) Community & Fellowship.  A few girls from my home group and I went to above said establishment to enjoy some of the last hours we have before our friend leave to go serve in West Africa.  We ate, played Heads Up and just had a great time!

5) Thunderstorms.  A huge storm came through tonight.  Numerous tornados touched down in the surrounding areas.  I pray everyone is ok, but I just love thunderstorms.  To me they are so calming!

Thankful for Today 5.13.13

1) Mondays! I mentioned a few posts back that Mondays often tend to be my favorite day of the week. Today proved to possibly take that award this week also. Every monday I meet with my dear friend Stephanie to do a Bible Study and catch up on life. We spent the lunch hour engaged in conversation and in the midst I got convinced to stay for the afternoon and eat supper with them! My love language is Quality Time and today was filled with just that!

 2) A clean house! I spent yesterday spring cleaning. I cleaned base boards, moved furniture to sweep, mopped, dusted and organized. I love waking up to deep cleaned home! When my home is clean and organized, my whole life somehow feels more organized.

 3) Fresh flowers! In April I got flowers from a number of friends for my birthday. I decided then that I wanted to have fresh flowers in my life at all times. I have a vase next to my computer at work and my goal is to always keep fresh flowers in it.

 4) Gummy Bears!

 5) Online shopping! I think that the world is out to get me, and no I'm not just being paranoid! It seems like everything I love in this world ends up getting discontinued {I was speaking in material terms... But maybe it's the same conspiracy theory when it comes to men in my life} The list seems to go on and on, the first to be discontinued was the Australian Toaster biscuit, then white coconut diet coke from Sonic, Clinique Black Amethyst eyeliner and the most recent to go Mango Madness lipgloss from Victoria's Secret. I have tried to find a replacement, I have tried so many different kinds of lipgloss and none compare. I had mourned the loss of this lipgloss when I decided to search amazon in a last ditch effort. I found it! I ordered 3 tubes and it arrived today! My lips are glossed and happy!

Happy {?} Mother's Day

Mother's Day has always been a hard day for me. I have never "known" my mom. Sure I spent two weeks every summer and a week at Christmas with her until I moved in with her full time at the age of 11, I then cohabited with her until I was 16, but I don't really know who she is. We have never had the typical mother/daughter relationship. We have both hurt each other and there have been years that have passed with no communication amongst us. Mother's Day has always reminded me of that hurt and every year has been a bitter-sweet day for me. My heart aches every year on this day that I don't know who my mother is, I long to hear her story one day but until then this day will have a sting in my heart.

 I love rejoicing on this day with those dear people in my life who have entered into motherhood.  I love watching my friends mother their sweet children. Every year I've  had such an anticipation of the day the deepest desire of my heart would be fulfilled and I would become a mom. I have always felt like, then, my life would be complete. I have longed for a family and every Mother's Day for the past 10 years I have prayed that would be the last one in which I would be single. This year was especially hard because for the first time I faced the reality that my deepest desire may never be fulfilled. I may never get to experience the joys of motherhood... And that makes my heart ache in a way I cannot explain.

Yesterday I read this article. A letter to a pastor from a non-mom about Mother's Day. I could not have said it better myself. There are so many times that I have felt "less than" because I am a 30-something single female without children. I often get the questions "Are you married? Have any kids?" When I answer "Nope, it's just me", I can see the look of pity on their faces and watch as they stumble to come up with what to say next.

 My heart aches on this day as motherhood is celebrated, I am so thankful for those women who mother well...That should be celebrated! But my heart hurts with the thought that I may never have that badge of honor.

So today I rejoice with those who are rejoicing and I mourn with those who are mourning.

Thankful for today 5.10.13

I have been amazed over the past few weeks how God has answered so many specific prayers that I have prayed. I am so thankful that God answers prayers! So today my 5 things I'm thankful for are truly answered prayers!

1)  Since I have moved to Fort Worth I have prayed for community. I have had seasons of really sweet community and fellowship but none like this current season. The Lord has blessed me recently with really sweet friendships that have been such an answer to this prayer! Every Monday I get the opportunity to spend my {extended} lunch break with one of these sweet friends. We have spent the last 4 months studying Gods word together and digging into each others lives. We spend our Mondays laughing and crying and learning more about God. It's become my favorite time of most every week!

2)  Children! It's been so sweet how the Lord has brought sweet little children into my life whom I just love and adore. I have loved spending time with my friends children and watching them grow. I think that's one of the greatest parts of living in community. I love holding the little bits and hearing them coo, my heart melts hearing these little ones call my name, and I just love rejoicing with my friends as they are expecting! I have struggled with the idea that I may never have a family of my own but The Lord has been so sweet to give me put these sweet children in my life in which my heart overflows for!

3) Being able to {really truly} rejoice with a sweet  friend as she got engaged. My dear friend Kati got engaged to an amazing man 2 weeks ago. My eyes filled with tears and my heart overflowed with joy when I heard the words "I'm getting married" come out of her mouth. It has been so sweet to walk with her and pray with her in this journey as she has prayed for her husband and I will be honored to stand up on July 7th in support of this marriage!

4) For how God has drawn me back to Him. These past few years have been hard! I don't think I realized how hard they were until now. I am realizing now how far I had drifted from the God I loved. It's been so sweet to be drawn back into His presence!

5) Ever since I spent 18 months at Heartlight my heart has been burdened to walk alongside people who are struggling. I have wanted to love people in the midst of the hardness of life and I have wanted to enter into the lives of those who are hurting and love them well. That was the motivation for getting my Social Work degrees and what drew me to working at MCOT. When I was given the opportunity to move into administration I really struggled with leaving direct care. I am in constant awe of how God is using the gifts He has given me and the desires He has laid on my heart to walk alongside my staff in hard times. I love that in my position I can really support my staff in a sweet way and that I can provide them with love and support. The people I work with really have become like family to me. I mourn when they mourn and I rejoice when they rejoice. I L-O-V-E how God knew this job would be the answer to my prayers I began praying almost 10 years ago!